Guys, this is for real. Young Mary Worthington of Shrevport, Kentucky needs our help. Mary has a rare disorder which makes it impossible for her to urinate between 12 noon and 4 a.m. This, understandably, has made her life very difficult. Throughout the day she is subject to extreme pain and usually does not take any liquids until the appointed hour.
MARY NEEDS OUR HELP
Clearly God is punishing Mary for her unchaste lifestyle by infecting her peehole. Bill Gates will donate $1, 000 everytime this message is forwarded one-thousand times. These donations will be used to stage mass protest outside Mary's house of sin. There will dripping faucets, self-righeousness and large placards reading 'KEEP IT OUT OF YOUR PANTS' (as Mary is a harlot, not a man with natural manly urges that must be "kept in the pants".) PLEASE HELP.
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And GOD BLESS OUR LEADER, George Walker "Texas Ranger" Bush
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